How to become a wedding officiant ... or whatever you want to be

On Saturday night, I officiated my second wedding. Much to the chagrin of Melissa and her mom, it wasn’t ours. During the cocktail hour (and a half), fellow guests wanted to know how I became a wedding officiant.

The answer’s simple. I started with ONE; I officiated my first wedding in November 2011 for friends from graduate school. The bride and groom bootstrapped a special evening of family and friends to celebrate their nuptials. The groomsmen and I fully transformed the venue during the cocktail hour, rearranging chairs, moving tables, and laying out place settings for each guest. We took the after party to Applebee’s for half-price appetizers. I slept like a king in a Holiday Inn Express next to a Waffle House. Everyone’s got a wedding story, and that one has been my go-to ever since.

So how did I get to number two? I’ve known the bride and groom from last weekend’s wedding for almost two decades, and thank them for including me in their big day. They heard about my first wedding officiant experience at Christmas a few years back and, when considering possibilities, asked me if I would reprise my officiant role for their wedding. I’ve now officiated two weddings and have a third booked for June 2014.

Your practice’s no different, whether you want to officiate weddings, manage complex commercial litigation or just make more money writing wills.

I met with a client today who a local funeral home invited to participate in its senior citizen expo. While he usually considers himself a business litigator, he readily told attendees about his recent estate planning experience with a few local families, including wills, living wills and power of attorney documents. In the eyes of his prospective clients, he was their elder law guy. Did it work? The appointments he scheduled over the next month are the result of simply sharing his actual experience with interested prospects.

So what do you want to be? A divorce attorney? A property tax appeal lawyer? An M&A attorney? If you done it just ONCE, start telling interested people about your experience. You never know where it might take you.  

The Fireman's Paradox

But we’re firemen,” Jake McCann would lament. “Firemen don’t ride around looking for fires. They wait for the firebell to ring.”

Jake was right. Firemen don’t go looking for fires. They respond when a fire breaks out. They don’t choose when or where the next fire breaks out. In fact, it’s ok when there isn’t a fire to which they respond.

But you’re not a fireman. You’re a professional. And still, every day, phone calls and emails signal fires and fire drills that you didn’t create and didn’t schedule.

Our luxury as professionals is that we can seek clients with the types of fires that we prefer to, are best equipped to and get paid handsomely to fight.

Do you want to keep fighting the same fires this fall? Let’s talk about focusing on the fires you WANT to fight.

Why I Wear a Bowtie

A New York Times writer once commented that “a list of bow tie devotees reads like a Who's Who of rugged individualists.” I couldn’t be prouder to include myself in that list.

I can’t take credit for my bowtie habit. Unbeknownst to many, my brother Michael joined the Blues, Episcopal Academy’s all-male a-cappella group. The school bowtie was the group’s signature look and endeared them to alumni, parents and fans across the Main Line. Through that experience, my brother taught our father and me how to tie my now-trademark bowtie.

After graduate school in Williamsburg, I worked at Philadelphia’s WASP-iest firm – Drinker Biddle & Reath LLP – where partners judged staff and rookies through their horn-rimmed spectacles. As a rugged individualist, I quickly realized that, by adopting the firm’s senior leaders’ WASP-y dress code, I would gain instant credibility. My closet already held the prerequisite worsted wool and tweed, and my limited bowtie selection quickly became the talk of the office. I produced numerous events on behalf of the firm, at which my bowtie identified me as the host, architect and concierge. As the legal industry slid towards business casual, I took my stand as a bowtie guy.

After work, Philadelphia’s young women seemingly ignored my then-portly frame and identified the redheaded bowtie guy as a potential suitor. Grooms wanted me in their wedding parties so I could tie their bowties. Brides introduced me to their bridesmaids. Moms and grandparents chatted me up like I was Winston Churchill. Along the way, girlfriends, family and colleagues all contributed new bowties to my collection, which now occupy an entire dresser drawer. For the young woman from Texas to whom I am committed, my bowtie fulfills all of her “Gone With The Wind” dreams. I still laugh when Sherman (a fellow redhead) burns Georgia.

Finally, I'm inspired by my friend Kunta Littlejohn. Hospitalized during his cancer battle as a young man, Kunta never gave up. His friend Dhani Jones, then an University of Michigan football all-star, asked him what he, as a student-athlete, could do to help his friend. Kunta, a huge bowtie guy, had a motto: “If you want to be anybody, you’ve got to rock the Bow Tie.” So Dhani wore one every day in support. The two friends continue to wear bowties and founded BowtieCause.org, which creates bowties to raise money for charities.

As the Founder and Chief Bowtie Guy of my own legal marketing firm, my bowtie identifies my unique approach to helping professionals to find new clients. It’s my immediate example of setting yourself apart in a busy marketplace. I believe firmly in business development strategies developed by bowtie-wearing salesmen through the 20th century. I supplement and improve said strategies by applying them to modern digital tools like LinkedIn, blogging and email marketing. All the while, the Chief Bowtie Guy practices what he preaches.

On National Bowtie Day (August 28), I encourage you to find your own bowtie, whether actual or conceptual, that identifies you as a rugged individualist in your network. Put yourself on this list.

4 Reasons Little League Matters

Philadelphia, desperate as always for a championship, rallied around its Taney Dragons last week as they participated in the Little League World Series. Although the Dragons were eliminated, their meteoric trajectory illuminated the important role that Little League Baseball and Softball plays in America.  Here are four reasons Little League matters.

1.       Little League trains young people to be part of a team. Instead of heads buried in IPhones, Little Leaguers pile out of the dugout when a teammate hits a homerun, they learn to hit the cutoff person, and they learn to rely on their teammates to turn a 6-4-3 double play.*

2.       As part of a team, Little League teaches kids to value team members with varied skill and skill levels. I’m still in awe of catchers’ willingness to squat as a target for a 75 mph projectile. They were glad to have me in right field in a league with few left handed hitters.

3.       Little League is 100% operated by volunteers, who have jobs, families and other kids who compete for their time and attention. In my practice, I meet with at least one Little League mom or dad every week. Their selflessness for the benefit of kids and baseball is beyond admirable.  Thank you for all that you do.

4.       Little League brings disparate adults together for the benefit of their kids. Have you met all of the moms and/or dads on your child’s Little League team? Do you enjoy an adult beverage in the stands with them? If you’re “too busy to network,” have you considered that the software designer, finish carpenter and pharmaceutical executive that you met last weekend all have networks into which you tap? Find them on LinkedIn and shoot them a message to connect. As soccer & football season starts, think about getting to know the fellow parents on the teams on which your kids play. You never know who you’ll meet.

*In a 6-4-3 double play, the shortstop (6) fields the ball hit by the batter, flips it to the second baseman (4) to make an out at 2nd base, who in turn throws it to the first baseman (3) to make an out before the batter reaches first base.

Don't Be Afraid of Shark Week

“It's that time of year everyone...Shark Week is coming! If you are interested in learning more about marketing and growing your business in this annual Discovery Channel event … reach out to me. I can help.”  

My former Comcast Spotlight colleague, Jeff McSparran, recently posted this update on his LinkedIn profile. Over his 17 years in media sales, Jeff’s witnessed the explosion of viewing options consumers have, from broadcast TV to cable, from basic cable to 900 channels, and now we can watch TV on our phones and tablets.  Even with all of those options, Discovery Channel brings its “Shark Week” franchise back every August to the delight (and horror) of its viewers.

So what? It’s a week of sharks on TV.

Do accountants play golf during tax season? Can financial advisors relax during the last week of December? Do fireworks stores close on the 4th of July? No, because these are their peak seasons.

Jeff doesn’t have a peak season, so he created his own by communicating a time-sensitive opportunity to prospective and existing customers in a friendly and professional manner. I bet your business has similar opportunities in its annual cycle. Are you sharing them with your customers and prospects? Don’t be afraid to talk about your own Shark Week.

Halfway there ...

Today's July 1st. You're already 6 months into 2014 and only 6 months from 2015 New Year's Resolutions.

It's not too late to find a better job, lose weight, or grow your business.

Why not take your 1st step towards personal independence today?

Thanks to everyone who sent me a comment regarding Jon Bon Jovi's "Living on a Prayer." It is indeed the inspiration for today's post.

Investing in Pro Bono work is good for business

In case you missed it ...
The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office issued a ruling yesterday that cancelled the Washington Redskins' trademarks because the team's name is disparaging. You may not know that my former colleagues at Drinker Biddle & Reath represented, pro bono, the 5 Native American plaintiffs in the case. Pro bono publica means “for the public good.” Thus, the firm took on the cause, the NFL and its lawyers on behalf of the people (and for free). In addition to a significant legal victory for those who object to the team’s name, the firm scored a huge public relations coup, as its name will remain in the news until a judge officially orders the team to change its name.

Volunteering is good for your business.
Everybody knows that most lawyers volunteer their time to help causes and people who can’t afford their services. I bet your business does, too. I believe that investing in pro bono or volunteer work is actually good for business. In addition to the good karma that donating your time creates, pro bono work often lends itself to professional development. Volunteering can apply your existing skills to a new problem, or allow you to develop new skills applicable in your workplace.  I’ve met countless awesome people through my volunteer efforts, including my girlfriend, for which I am very grateful. Finally, pro bono work demonstrates your humility and benevolence, traits often lost in modern-day business.

Spread the word; share your cause; make a friend.
As a marketer, I applaud the humility inherent in your volunteer efforts, but I ask that you show a bit more benevolence in telling people about what you’re doing. ”Aw shucks, I don’t want credit,” you say, but the organizations you support need your help as their ambassador. Whether you grow moustaches for cancer, volunteer for an arts organization or support the environment, don’t be afraid to tell customers, prospects and friends who you support and why the cause is important to you. You might be surprised who shares your passion for similar causes and the relationships that your common causes create. Investing in pro bono work is indeed good for your business.

Thanks, Leo, for the inspiration.   

Are you worried about making partner at your firm?

Is finding clients a concern for your professional future?

You're not alone. Law firm associates nationwide are worried about building a "book of business" while also meeting their billable hour requirements. Gone are the days that one could make partner without her own clients.

What are you going to do?

Let's talk about how you can develop clients through your own network.

Our first client made partner!

The very first Big Law associate with whom I worked independently made partner at his AmLaw 125 firm last month. He positioned himself as the firm's go-to real estate attorney and, in his proposal, I helped highlight how he increased revenues from firm clients through his expertise and dedication to client service. Since then and among other things, he tackled a challenging deal over a holiday weekend, furthering his story. Firm leadership recognized his accomplishments and welcomed him to the partnership earlier this summer.

Let's chat about your partnership goals this summer and how developing a book of business can increase the potential to do so.

Summertime ... and the networking is easy

Successful people know that summer is a HOT time to grow their businesses. Use this summer's weddings, graduation parties and barbecues to reconnect with neighbors, old friends and former colleagues, and to make new connections. Make one connection every weekend this summer and you'll have two new opportunities by September.

Who did you see this weekend? Most importantly, have you called him to schedule a lunch to discuss new opportunities? While l focus my work on helping lawyers find clients, let's network together this summer.

Oh the people you'll meet shoveling snow

Philadelphia's melting today and I'm going to miss the snow.

Why?

I've met dozens of great people shoveling snow. Because Philadelphia requires property owners to clear their sidewalks within 6 hours after the last flake, we rush outside armed with shovels and rocksalt to avoid a citation and/or the liability of a slip & fall lawsuit.  Initially, the neighborhood scowled at untreated sidewalks, but we soon bonded over the incessant stream of snow. The 99 year old doctor usually has one of his kids staying with him, but the snow fouled their travel plans. The elderly landlords next door lost power in their suburban home while their Gen Y tenants complained about their slippery stoop. We all chipped in and shoveled beyond our own property lines, resulting in clear sidewalks.

But clear sidewalks create more than safe walking.  We created a much happier neighborhood. We made friends and met for drinks. We scheduled meetings and created opportunities. And we probably raised our property values in the eyes of prospective buyers.

All because we shoveled snow.  Who did you meet when you left your home or office this winter?

It's not as easy as it looks ...

In the spirit of practicing what you preach, I built this website over the last two weeks using a Squarespace template. While I've advised a number of organizations on their website, I have never built my own.

I'm not sure I'll do it again.

Unless you have a ton of images, Squarespace is not your friend. It's perfect for restaurants, cafes, guide services, travel destinations and other businesses that have pretty places to show off.  I'm in the business of helping lawyers to create referrals; the marionette doesn't want to be a puppet.

PS - All of the images on my webpage came off my IPhone camera roll.